Oh geeze louise it is so cold outside. Yes, I will be another blogger who talks about weather, whether you like it or not! Ah! I even impress myself with my puns sometimes. But seriously, have you looked at Calgary's weather forecast? It is insane. I will teach you 2 ways to make winter just that much better.
This first one works best if you don't have a garage like me. In order to give your car the winter TLC that it needs, il faux que (za franch say it best) you go directly to the nearest mall with an underground parking lot and you park that baby! And shop!! You have to keep it in there for no less than an hour and the longer the better really. You cannot be responsible for purchases during this time and it doesn't really matter anyways because the TLC you are giving your car will end up saving you $$ in the long run, which money you just spent at H&M. Then when you go home, make sure to take your time in the parking garage to knock all that ice off the wheel wells and to of course de-ice the wings (windshield wipers).
The second one I just figured out right now. If your hands are so dry that the ends of your fingers are starting to peel, feel free to use your expensive face cream as hand lotion. Readers, it works like a charm! My fingertips are now smooth and soft. Not even my body butter was doing it. I'm not surprised though, my delicate hands only like the best and I bet yours will too.
Therein lie two secrets that help me get through these painful months. Well, there is a third. That would be to move directly to Washington D.C., to pass go and collect $200. I know it gets cold there, but considering that my friends at Wikipedia say the all time coldest it has ever been there is -26 C/-15 F, I will take it! And that was back in the Great Blizzard of 1899. Dude, I will take it! I lived through, no joke, -50 C many a times here in the True North Strong and Free.
Now I want to hear from you. Who the heck in Calgary and area is reading my bloggy blog? Please leave a comment even if I don't know you read this or I have never met you. I want to know who you are and in return I may write something really funny, I don't know. But anyways, show yourselves and then I'll start reading your blogs and it will be so fun. And then we can braid each others hair, but all my layered pieces will fall out. Sigh.
6 woot-woots!:
P, it is I, your sister Nunu. I read your blog!!! Fact: the only place in the world colder than Alberta right now is Antarctica. It is a disgusting fact. I have to sleep with socks & toque, put vaseline on my feet and salve on my hands, had 2 coffees, 1 tea, 1 hot chocolate, and 1 bowl of stew for early dinner. My nips could laser slice through the ice all over my windshield.
Extra emollient night cream works great for dry skin/hands too. I had to use some last night. I love your blog. You really are too cute. Karen
Thanks Karen! Now, do you blog? How do I know you, or are we no internet friends. I am going to look into that lotion!!
I read your blog! And I am in Calgary and am frezing my butt off! Well...I wish I was literally freezing it off, it could use some weight loss!
Anyways, I am now an avid reader of your blog...and you asked where I went on my mission...Puerto Rico! I wish I was there in the sun right now...
i read too! And yes, one day when you and Dan come back to Calgs and visit, i WILL make you doughnuts
I read you, but you, of course, already knew that little tidbit. I'd read you even more if I ever actually went on my blog.
I love that your dear Nunu informed us that she has nippy noodles. I too worry that I could accidentally slash expensive upholstery or possibly etch some glass.
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